Survivor Advocate Stories

Brooke is survivor advocate who is telling her story to support others to better recognise family violence, and to know how to respond if they suspect it’s happening to a family member or friend.

For Brooke, the impact of the violence she experienced on how she presented herself day-to-day was drastic. She went from being chatty and dressed up for school drop off, to wearing trackpants, her head down, and not talking to other parents.

Signs of violence were noticed at the time, and the police were notified. However, when they questioned Brooke, they did so in front of the person using violence. Brooke was too scared to tell the truth, so she agreed with the person using violence and told the police it was self-harm.

Brooke experienced family violence over a period of 10 months. Whenever she attempted to leave, her partner swore it wouldn’t happen again and pledged to seek help. The behaviour only worsened over time. Her partner controlled every aspect of her life – trapping her at home and refusing to let her speak to friends.

On one occasion, Brooke was admitted to hospital with serious injuries. The violence was reported to police and a safety check was done. Brooke knew she needed to escape, but the hospital did not recognise her partner was the person using violence, and she returned home.

In 2017, after being discharged from hospital, Brooke thought quickly, and for her own safety, came up with a reason to call an ambulance. The paramedics recognised she needed help, and refused to let the person using violence into the ambulance. They took her to hospital and got hospital security to attend, to keep Brooke safe. Brooke ended up in hospital for three months, where she was linked with family violence police officers.

Brooke said that the ‘silver lining’ of it all was that she has been able to rebuild her relationship with her mum. She also subsequently met her fiancé, who she describes as ‘her safe haven’.

Brooke is determined to support everyone to be able to better recognise and respond to family violence, and to educate people to look for non-verbal cues that someone might not be safe.

Brooke wants to support survivors to know that what they’re experiencing is not ok, and that there are services available to support them.

Deepika is a member of GenWest’s Survivor Advisory Group. Her story highlights the need for better education and awareness of family violence amongst culturally diverse communities.

Deepika is a survivor advocate who is committed to supporting multicultural communities to recognise family violence, and to destigmatise it.

Deepika tells her story to her community as a way of removing the shame that survivors in communities like hers can feel. She says, ‘I don’t know why there is shame – but if someone stands up, and tells their story, there will be less of it’. She has decided to tell her story ‘Not just for myself, but for the greater community’.

Deepika got married and moved to Australia at the age of 25. She did not know the person she married and had no supports around her. She experienced family violence and says that the most difficult aspect was being alone, and isolated from her family and community at this time.

Deepika says that in her culture and in her community, only physical violence is seen as such – emotional and psychological abuse, or concepts like coercive control, are not recognised or understood. She said that even physical violence is ignored, and that there was an expectation that she endure the violence she experienced. Deepika is determined to change this.

Deepika said that marriage is sacred in her community, and when she eventually tried to leave, ‘fingers were pointed at me’. Her partner was abusive and controlling, and the impact on Deepika was considerable. Her health declined and she became very unwell, and was unable to work for a time.

Deepika was eventually able to leave the violent relationship, but experienced a lack of support after escaping the violence. She said ‘I had a tough time keeping myself going emotionally and psychologically’. Her sister had to relocate to care and support for Deepika, and there was a lack of support for her as a secondary victim, too.

Deepika found that the support services she was able to be connected with did not have a cultural lens, and that this was a tremendous barrier. Another barrier Deepika faced was a lack of understanding from her employer. Deepika works in a male dominated industry as a software engineer. She said while her workplace tried to be supportive, they didn’t know how to respond. There is a clear need to improve responses to family violence from employers and industries.

Deepika is determined to increase awareness of family violence amongst communities like hers. She spoke of the importance of education in communities to improve their ability to recognise and respond to family violence in all its forms. Deepika highlighted that a culturally diverse lens is necessary for support services, too.

Joal is a survivor advocate who experienced family violence as a child, and again as a young mum to two children.

Joal is a member of GenWest’s Survivor Advisory group. As a survivor of family violence as a child and as an adult, Joal is committed to advocating for services that break cycles of intergenerational violence. The Australian Bureau of Statistics shows that people who have experienced childhood abuse are more likely to go on to experience violence and abuse by a partner as an adult, compared to those who have not experienced childhood abuse.

Joal worries about the impact of this on her own two children, and worries about the lack of services and support available for children and young people who have experienced violence.

Joal experienced periods of homelessness over the years - in her teens, 20s and again in her 30s - as a result of family violence. Joal told us that stable housing is foundational to a healthy and stable routine, and without this she was unable to even begin to recover from her experiences.

Family violence is the leading cause of homelessness for women. While there are crisis refuges available, there is not enough stable and affordable medium- and long-term accommodation for victim survivors to move into after being in a refuge.

Joal was diagnosed with PTSD and ADHD. She has struggled to access ongoing support to continue her journey of recovery. However, she was grateful that her GenWest case manager supported her to get an ADHD assessment and diagnosis as part of her package of support.

Joal is telling her story because it reminds her that her experience wasn’t for nothing: she is passionate about sharing her story to prevent others experiencing the same systemic trauma she went through. Joal is keen to use her voice to advocate for improved services for other survivors.

Lauren is a member of GenWest’s Survivor Advisory Group. Lauren experienced family violence as a child; her father was the person using violence against her and her sibling.

Lauren’s parents separated when she was a year old. Her father had used violence against her mum. After they separated, he remained in contact with her and her sibling, and was physically, emotionally and financially abusive. Lauren is still living with the impacts of the abuse as an adult.

Lauren said that it was only as an adult that she recognised that the experiences she had as a child were family violence, and that she was a survivor of this. Lauren described that her and her sibling were not recognised as victim survivors in their own right and that support services were very limited, and were rarely available for children.

Growing up, Lauren was repeatedly told that she was lucky to have her father in her life. She spoke of how the adults in her life at the time failed to recognise that she was experiencing violence. She said, she was never unclean or in dirty clothes as a child – the outward signs of something being ‘wrong at home’ weren’t obvious in that respect. Lauren said that the adults around her should have asked questions. That keeping children like her and her sibling safe is everyone’s responsibility.

Lauren chose to share her story with us help others to recognise family violence, and to support other survivors – especially children – to know they haven’t done anything wrong. Lauren spoke about the importance of services like GenWest’s Children’s Counselling service and is a keen advocate for better and more accessible services for child victim survivors.

Lauren spoke of her family violence experience as being ‘like alchemy’. Sharing her story to help others and improve services is the glimmer of gold that has supported her as she continues to heal.

Lea is a survivor advocate and member of GenWest’s survivor advisory group. She experienced violence perpetrated by her husband over a period of 30 years.

Lea tried to leave the relationship a number of times over the years, which included staying in two crisis refuges the first time she left. Lea spoke about the difference in services available to victim survivors over this period.

When she first tried to leave, public housing was much more readily available, but there were little to no other supports available for victim survivors of family violence after a home was secured. Now, lack of safe housing options is a major obstacle for victim survivors.

The final time Lea left her relationship was during the COVID-19 lockdown. Lea was experiencing serious and ongoing emotional and financial abuse, and her health deteriorated, resulting in stays in hospital.

During the lockdown, Lea tried to access family violence support services, but was unable to connect with them. Many services had long wait lists at this time, due to unprecedented demand. Lea was able to advocate for herself and contacted her local Member of Parliament, whose office contacted other services and was able to link Lea with GenWest.

Lea was then able to access a range of supports to establish a new life for herself. Flexible Support Packages enabled her to buy the practical items she needed - like a bed and a vacuum cleaner. She was also able to access Neuro Emotional Technique (NET) sessions with a chiropractor, which had a lasting positive impact on her health and wellbeing.

Lea sees the impact of her husband’s behaviour on her adult children, and worries about the behaviours they grew to accept as normal. Lea said she wished there were better supports available to break intergenerational cycles of violence and support those trying to do so.

She feels there is a lack of recognition of the impacts of financial and emotional abuse. Funding, services, and media stories frequently highlight the impact of physical violence, but the very real impacts of non-physical violence are also lasting, and better awareness and support are needed.

Lea found a supportive network by joining GenWest’s Sunrise program. While Lea has highly valued being part of this program, she also wishes there were better long-term supports available for victim survivors. “Someone to keep you on track later on”, she told us, would make all the difference.

The impacts of Lea’s experience will be with her forever; her healing journey is ongoing.

Liz is a family violence advocate, who is motivated to tell her story as part of her own healing, and also to raise awareness of the extent of family violence in Australia.

In 1987, Liz’s sister Vicki was killed by her ex-boyfriend. Liz was 14 and lived in the country, and would often come to Melbourne to stay with her older sister, with whom she was close and Vicki was like her second mum.

At the time, Liz and her other family members were unaware that Vicki was experiencing violence. Liz said that her sister’s boyfriend had never acted in a way that made any of them suspect he was being violent. It was only until after they had broken up that Vicki told her family. For many victim survivors, the period after separation is their time of highest risk. Following the break up, Vicki’s then ex-boyfriend attacked her, and she was killed.

Liz said that in 1987, the only support she was aware of for victim survivors like Vicki was an Intervention Order. Liz spoke about how glad she is that services like GenWest and Safe Steps now exist, because ‘back when we went through it, we were not aware of any services that were available’. Liz said that there is more to be done, and she continues to advocate for better supports for victim survivors in navigating courts and the justice system.

Liz described how Vicki’s ex-boyfriend was charged with manslaughter under the now abandoned provocation law. Liz said that the process of going through the courts was ‘like going through it all again’. Vicki’s family tirelessly campaigned for years, until the provocation law was abolished in 2005. Their campaign still continues.

Liz is a member of GenWest’s survivor advisory group, and spoke of how the group has enabled her to advocate and build strong connections with the other members. Liz said that these days, she ‘tries to live through her sister’ – she travels and goes to see bands her sister liked, to have the experiences her sister never got to have.

Being part of the Survivor Advisory Group has been deeply meaningful, both personally and professionally. Coming together with others who share lived experience created a space of genuine understanding and safety, where our voices weren’t just heard but valued as integral to shaping better outcomes for those affected by violence.

Through this experience, I’ve grown by both sharing my story and insights but also by listening to the experience of the other women. We may all come from different walks of life, but lived experience ties us together, giving each of us a sense of unity, sisterhood, and we are transformed simply by listening.

The Survivor Advisory Group allowed me to transform difficult past experiences into a source of purpose and advocacy. I’ve learned that healing doesn’t always happen in isolation, sometimes, it’s found in collective voice, collaboration, and being part of change that reaches beyond ourselves.

One project that stood out to me was our contribution to GenWest’s submission into the Victims Charter Review. It was powerful to see our input directly influence the language, tone, and approach of what it truly means to ‘see’ victim survivors, and help shape that submission to change the Victims Charter. Ensuring that language and definitions reflect compassion, dignity, and real-world understanding. That sense of tangible impact reminded me that lived experience is not a story of survival alone, but a source of wisdom that can guide systemic reform that will last beyond the Advisory Group’s lifespan. It’s truly a beautiful opportunity to be able to assist in shaping such valuable work.

Being part of the group has strengthened my ability to advocate with clarity and confidence. Personally, it’s deepened my healing, simply as a by-product of participation. Being in unity with the other women has helped me see how my journey can create ripples of safety, hope, and empowerment for others. I’ve learned that advisory groups like ours are vital. They ensure the systems that aim to protect and support are informed by the people who’ve actually walked the path and used them.

To policymakers and service providers, I would say this: the inclusion of lived experience voice isn’t optional, it’s essential. It bridges the gap between intention and impact, policy and person.

I would absolutely encourage others with lived experience to get involved. It’s not always easy to revisit parts of your story, but the process is profoundly empowering. Its healing by sharing. You’re not only reclaiming your narrative, you’re helping to build a future where others may not have to endure what you did.

I was hesitant when I saw the job posting for GenWest’s Victim Survivor Advisory Group. I was still grappling with naming my experiences of family violence, and I didn’t have service user experience. I felt insecure about my experience, my latency in understanding my childhood abuse, and it felt dizzyingly counterintuitive to choose to take up space in that way.

I sat with it, forgot about it, and the job posting came up again. Two years and some months later I know fate nudged me into this group. Two years later and I’ve hardly begun. I am now a family violence professional, and have been appointed to the Victim Survivor Advisory Council.

I am proud to represent GenWest, who I feel truly and deeply listen to the voices of victim survivors. Being a victim survivor advocate has felt crystallising, like something truly clicked and settled within me.

People often think victim survivors are weak; vulnerable, needing protection from a familiar world. I hope to destigmatise the role of lived experience in the workforce, to have difficult and uncomfortable conversations with heart and to change the way we see victim survivors.

I hope to be an advocate that listens more than I speak, and to be someone that uplifts and makes space for the voices we don’t often hear and to whom we owe the most.

I would like to end with a note of gratitude to the people in this group: I have learned so much from each and every one of you. It is not easy work, but you make it feel safe and palpably possible. We are not similar in many ways, and for these differences I am so grateful. You bridge service gaps, build wisdom and bring others along with you. You make me think bigger and you make me bolder, it is a privilege to do this work alongside you.

Being part of the Survivor Advisory Group has been one of the most grounding experiences of my life. It’s not just a space to share—it’s a space where lived experience is respected, valued, and used to drive real change. GenWest didn’t just invite us to the table—they made sure our voices shaped the agenda.

Since joining, I’ve grown in ways I didn’t expect. Professionally, I’ve refined trauma-informed intake tools, strengthened documentation practices, and supported others to do the same. Personally, it’s helped me reconnect with my own journey not just as a survivor, but as someone who can lead, influence, and reform systems. This group gave me the confidence to speak publicly. I’ve spoken at rallies, recorded a podcast and video with my brother Phil Cleary on justice reform, and begun other media projects involving further podcasts. It’s emotional, yes, but also empowering reclaiming space and turning pain into purpose.

One of the most meaningful contributions I’ve made was to GenWest’s policy submission on service gaps for women experiencing family violence. Drawing from lived experience, I helped shape survivor-informed recommendations. It felt like everything I’d been through was being channelled into something that could make a difference.

Survivor voice is incredibly precise. We know where systems fail because we’ve lived it. When supported to speak, we don’t just raise awareness we raise standards.

The connection between members is powerful. We hold space for each other, challenge systems together, and celebrate growth. It’s not just a group, it’s a community of reformers and truth-tellers.

I encourage others with lived experience to get involved. It takes emotional preparation and strong boundaries, but the impact is real. You’re not just telling your story you’re helping shape the future.

To policymakers and service providers: groups like this aren’t optional. They’re essential. If you want ethical, effective systems, you must centre survivor voices in co-design, decision-making, and accountability.

This course also inspired me to pursue further study. I’m close to completing my Advanced Certificate in Community Services, which has deepened my understanding and strengthened my ability to advocate for ethical, trauma-informed practice. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed my involvement with GenWest.